It has been a long and winding road (well not that long, and only sort of winding), but I have come to the conclusion that security and freedom are two very different things. In fact, they are mutually exclusive. I found that as in my younger years I was closer to my parents way of thinking, go to school, get a job with benefits, then retire after 30+ years.
Um? WTF? My father is still at fortune 50 company, going in the same door day after day for 34 years. Now I really can't blame him, for that was what he was trained to do, and I cannot knock him for doing it because it provided me with a good childhood. However, I think I realized a long time ago I wanted to own my own business (I used to dream of owning a grocery store for some reason), but I allowed FUD (fear, uncertainty, and doubt) muddle me. It crept in and stole my time (and time is gold). I also bought into the new "American dream" of debt, mortgage, marriage, kids, job with benefits, and 3 weeks vacation a year that made jumping ship just that much harder. Some where around the dot com boom I started getting antzy, but not a big baller to go out on my own.
Now, I don't have it that bad in my job. I work from home, on proof of concept for 3d MMOC. I am paid ok. However, the number of hours I put in don't equate. The fact they act like they "own my mind" really bothers me. Also, I know I can be replaced by a global resource that I cannot compete with monetarily (that I may have to train). If I have the risks, I might as well get the rewards. I have come to realize I don't want to climb the corporate ladder (I never did, I am too non conformist as it was, going down this path was good for experience, but the experience is almost a fine line to a waste of time).
No, I don't want to be an employee, and lately in my new position I realize I don't know if I want to be the manager either. I want to be the owner. I want to own the corporate ladder. Granted, I know I will have to be a manager for a bit as I build a new company.
Oh wait, did I mention that? I am building a company. But what will I build? No clue at this point (well that is sort of a lie, but I won't revel it just yet). I have decided it is time to SOGOTP (Sh!t Or Get Off The Pot). No I am bootstrapping, and the hardest part is to find the time for everything (starting up a company, maintain a good standing at work, personal life, hobbies, and this blog :-) ). I believe with some newly acquired organization and relaxation skills, I will accomplish it all to the time when I "cut the strings".
It still amazes me that people want to be an employee. I have gotten into arguments with several friends that tell me I don't have it that bad and I maybe being foolish. So be it. It amazes me that I have not gotten something better going before this (but I keep trying and will do so until I do). To have that security, instead of the freedom. I know first hand it is hard to do, to let go, especially if you have responsibilities. However, I don't ask anyone to take care of me, but I also want all the rewards. And I will get them.
2 comments:
I've always thought that it would be great to be captain of your own ship. I guess my aversion to dealing with the business side of things would probably keep me from ever doing that, but it would be great to be successful on your own terms.
Good luck. Hope that it works out well for you.
hi.. I read book on that and heard a lot.. I felt it too! it's always better to create own work/business/anything you interest in and love doing it for life.. rather than work for someone who you don't want to or on something you don't like at all.. It's tough and cannot rush, but the final goal we are working toward should be always - for Freedom.. Cheers
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